v18: noir&blanc

sherlene

the girl's 18. stuck on a small island, also known as the little red dot on the global map. presently living a mundane life contributing to the unemployment rate and chionging driving lessons are what she does nearly daily. well, here records some of the interesting and amusing moments she enjoys. :D

turns 365 days older on the 7th of Nov and is deeply in love with the colour purple. currently indulging in SUPER JUNIOR! :D

Super Junior M - 迷 (Me)

get it in stores 2 or 9 May depending on your region!

favourites

corkboard

statistics

hooligans crashed & graffitied.

currently hooligan(s) rotting here.

extreme tracker

Mittwoch, Oktober 29

Photographic Memories 7:31 PM

Got myself a new camera.. Canon Powershot S5 IS at a really good price cos it's been discontinued.. XD

So, here's some random pictures I took.. While on the car.. Love the image stabilizer quality..

KPOP FESTIVAL 2008! Can't wait~
All the boys be loving me, girls be hating me~

Can't see what's that orangy thingy on the SG Flyer?

It's a pumpkin head! Happy early Halloween!

Playing around with the colour accent..

Life's as boring as usual.. It's almost November, in 2 days time.. Time flies.. Next year, I'll be 8 hours away.. Missing home??

I wonder..

Labels: pictures, sentimental, tired

Sonntag, Oktober 26

The Eulogy 1:18 AM

During that.. I didn't cry..

I kept repeating in my head, be strong, be strong..
Somehow I felt that Ah Gong wanted happiness to be around, he wanted people to not worry about him, he wanted everyone to celebrate his journey in life..
Still, it almost came out when my cousin said her last words to him on behalf of all the grandchildren.. It was.. Too overwhelming.

It was an amazing 91 years.
And I guess I wasn't able to grieve as much as my other cousins who went on trips to the States, Europe etc with him in their younger days and had more fond memories of him.. But.. The lone Phuket trip we had together.. It was just my best, and his latest memory.

More tears than in 2005.. But I'm glad he has ended his suffering.
R.I.P, Gong Gong ♥♥♥

-------

On the other hand, the wake was a good avenue for friends and family to catch up. This time, it was good for me going to Melb.. Cousins giving me great advice.. James coming back from Melb and my parents entrusting him responsibility to give me a scolding if anything went wrong XD.. Giffy coming back all the way from Bangkok to pay his last respects..

And his Korean friend who totally looks like Masi Oka, 유정, who imparted a whole ton of 한국어 to me at like 12am.. Leaving Giffy and I all @__@ and complaining that our contacts were stinging and dry while the brains were malfunctioning. LOL.

He told me to type in full Korean sentences if I talk to him on msn. OMGAH. =.=
He'll probably be like (!@*(!*@(!*@(*!; what is she talking about!?

And he's from Seoul Uni. (I think) OMGOSH, like the best uni in Korea. So smart. >.< So it was pretty hilarious 'spazzing' with them cos they're like 20 over and Giffy reminds me a whole lot of Lee Seung Gi (aish, missed my fave 2d1n yest..), and the irony that his gf and I do not know each other (but we'll be in the same country soon) but the BOTH of us said that he does look like Lee Seung Gi. HAHA. How uncanny is that.

But he does! And I just shouted '이승기'! And the guilty-one-who-denies-the-truth turned around -__-'''
Plus, the greater irony is that he likes So Hee! XD And So Hee said that she likes LSG best from 2d1n.. Amajingggg. ;;;

This morning after coming back from Mandai, I was playing Nobody and So Hot on my phone and the fanboy was going.. SEND ME! SEND ME! MAYBE I CAN USE IT AS MY RING TONE. LOL XD So funny.

Anyhow, to everyone,
기분 내세요!! :D :D

Dienstag, Oktober 21

my 할아버지's gone 8:17 PM

Perhaps it dawned on me a while later.. When I was in the washroom and thinking about what he went through, or what I knew that he went through..

Perhaps it was the language barrier, that all I could ask every time I saw him was only, "Ah Gong, ho bo?" (Ah Gong, you good?) and see him smile toothlessly and nodding at everyone else who acknowledges him..

Somehow.. I had this awkward feeling.. And I was talking to S about it today in the office, about grandparents, before I called Mum and then she broke the news..

I don't know how to feel.. It's just that when I was in the OT alone.. Tears streamed down.. I.. I don't know how to cope with the sudden loss in the family. And Dad's being awfully strong about it.. Telling me that everything's fine and I should just go back to work, and not worry about it.

It was 3 years ago then my grandma left us.. It was really strong of Ah Gong to be mentally aware that she was gone, for she had been suffering longer than he had.. Illnesses which plagued her.. Getting ferried in and out of the hospital.. And for all that time, he was just by her side..

He was healthily walking and taking buses up to JB even at 80 by himself and exploring the island.. It was until he had this serious fall that he became wheelchair-bound..

Last week, he couldn't swallow food and they had to send him to TTSH. In a way, I was ignorant and in fact, relieved that TTSH was just opposite Square 2 where I could find out about the Kpop Con tix.. I know, just kill me for being such an idiot..

I took for granted, that all the times he was shuffling in and out of hospital due to minor illnesses, difficulty in breathing and such.. Was leess likely to be fatal than what Mama suffered, i.e stroke..

Then today, they were trying to fix the tubing back so that they could feed him, and Dad said that probably the doctor was inexperienced, and they overlooked certain areas and hence Ah Gong suffered a fatal heart attack.

Perhaps I wasn't close to him, due to the age gap and language barrier.. But he was indeed dear.. He would lighten up the room with his cheery smile and at the beginning of the year, when he celebrated his birthday and could still hear a little more than last Sunday, when someone asked, "Ah Gong, how old are you?", he'd put up both his hands and tell you that he's 100.

♥♥♥

I'm proud my Ah Gong has lived a fulfilling life.. On Sunday when I last saw him, he was all frail and skinny.. And then the adults were talking about euthanasia and stuff like that.. About not wanting to live that old in tremendous agony, not being able to speak, see or hear properly and barely able to communicate with your loved ones..

Perhaps, it's a blessing that God took him away to end his suffering.. It has been accumulating much..

Ah Gong, may you rest in peace, I love you forever.
♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

Labels: depressed, family

Montag, Oktober 13

제발 8:21 PM

Certain things have been going through my mind these days.

All I want for this year.. T__T
Before I leave for Aussieland..

I know it's nothing big, nothing to hype over..
Yet it means so much to me,

나는 필요 열셋 명.